Udo's Techblog

I'm having fun with Wikipedia's list of national Faux Pas (Is that even a plural form? Damn I need to learn basic French soon!). After enjoying the more exoting countries, I was somewhat surprised by many of the German no-nos. Look at the sheer size of that list, it's even longer than Japan's! I take it many of those "rules" are taken from "Knigge", the standard book on appropriate behavior, which has only a casual relationship with cultural truth. Here's the full list, with comments according to my own perception:





Germans tend to be more reserved than e.g. Americans. [...] True, but that's not something most Germans are particularly proud of...





Shaking hands and saying "Guten Morgen", "Guten Tag" or "Guten Abend" (good morning, good afternoon, good evening) or, less formal, "Hallo" (hello) is the conventional salutation. [...] True!





If the name of a person is known, it is expected to be added to a salutation ("Guten Tag, Herr/Frau ...") (Good day, Mr./Mrs. ...). [...] In my experience unnecessary frequent mentionings of one's full name is as often done in rude contexts as not.





It is becoming increasingly uncommon to refer to an adolescent unmarried female as "Fr�ulein" (=meaning "Miss") True, it is considered sexist to use that title.





As is the case in many languages featuring a T-V distinction, addressing someone with the familiar second person pronoun ("Du") when they should be addressed with the formal form ("Sie") is inappropriate. True, however, the familiar ("Du") pronoun is becoming more common, even among business partners and is especially common in use for people under, say, 30.





Addressing someone by their first name without mutual agreement is considered overly familiar. True, but it depends on the sort of people you're around and on the type of social event. E.g., people talking to one another at a party or club don't ever address each other formally, it would be considered rude to be unnecessarily.





Be wary of touching someone who is not an intimate or close friend, or a business partner/customer you got to know very well. It may be considered inadequate. While I believe there is no culture where excessive touching goes over very well, I also think Germans are not exactly picky in that respect.





Asking an unfamiliar woman for her weight or age (especially if she appears older than yourself) is rude. Yeah, but how many times have you stopped strangers on the street to ask their weight and age recently?





Opening a door that someone has closed for privacy without knocking or otherwise seeking permission is considered rude and an invasion of privacy. I'm not sure what that's supposed to mean. If somebody wants to be alone, isn't it always rude to disregard that wish?





It is good manners to greet strangers entering a waiting room, and when sharing tables, and to say goodbye. It is not customary to greet strangers on the street. In some situations the greeting is optional, like when entering an elevator. That's a Seinfeldian dilemma, I don't think there's anything special to Germany in this one.





The tapping of one's index finger on the side of their head, or the waving of one's hand from left to right in front of their face (palm of the hand towards the face) are both considered offensive gestures. [...] In some cases, especially regarding police officers or judges, the offense may be fined. The severity of this offense has lessened to some extent in the last decades. Well, it's a general gesture indicating that something's wrong with somebody's head (not necessarily the person in front of you, though). I wouldn't worry about offensiveness, even my grandma does it and she's 96.





Giving s.o. the finger is a major offense. Duh, you mean, like, in every other country in the world?





It is not common in Germany to talk about someone's income or financial situation or, in particular, to boast about it. True. Then again, for me, like most Germans, not thinking about income at all is probably a good way to keep our blood pressure down. If someone is doing really great financially, I'm usually happy for them.





Allthough discussing political topics is not generally frowned upon, people normally don't tell their voting decision with regard to elections being held by secret ballot. Asking for it is considered very nosy and intrusive. True to a degree, but man, Germans love talking about politics!





Displaying a swastika and other Nazi symbols as well as certain Nazi-gestures is illegal in Germany and considered extremely rude and will be fined. True, Nazi symbology is not covered by Free Speech in Germany.





It can be considered rude to mention or refer to Nazi Germany during normal conversation, unless the topic was started/offered by a German. [...] I don't think that's true. If you have questions regarding this topic, most Germans would prefer you ask them straight away, instead of speculating wildly.





Smokers and non-smokers are to mutually respect each other. Smoking in non-smoking areas is considered to be very rude. [...] True!





It is generally considered impolite to begin eating one's dinner before the hostess or eldest lady have been seated, everyone seated has been served, and before wishing each other "Guten Appetit" (lit.: good appetite). True, but of course it doesn't matter in informal contexts (though it can be considered a nice touch even then).





It is considered rude to take the last bit of a dish without asking if any other person would like to have some, or taking a second portion while other people have not finished their first. To a degree, but that's fading tradition.





When eating, use a knife and fork. Normally the fork is held in the left hand throughout the meal, but the North American custom of holding a fork in the right hand and switching will be overlooked provided a knife is held at all times. The North American custom of eating with just a fork is considered bad table manners. True, but only in formal settings.





Letting one or both hands rest under the table or on your lap during eating is considered bad table manners, as is resting your ellbow on the table. Place your wrist or forearm on the table. Wow, I didn't know that one...





During a meal, crossing your cutlery on the plate means that you are taking a break, but have not finished eating. If you are finished, place you knife and fork parallelly on the plate. Most people don't observe that ritual anymore, especially the first part.





If you served yourself, or had the opportunity to tell the serving person to stop serving you (so, almost always except in a restaurant), it is considered rude to not finish your plate. I guess if you loaded up huge amounts and don't finish, it's considered wasteful. Other than that, I wouldn't worry about this one.





Noticeable smacking or slurping is considered bad manners, not to mention belching or farting. Yup, true.





It is considered impolite to not cover your mouth and nose when sneezing, coughing or yawning. Turn away from people when blowing your nose. The general idea is to not spray other people with fluids and germs... so: true!





When clinking glasses you are supposed to look into the person's eyes who you are toasting. Not doing so results in seven years of bad luck (or, more specifically, bad sex). I never heard of that one, but then again... no bad sex, so I must have observed this one ;-)





Putting your glass down on the table after clinking glasses (and before drinking) is considered rude in some parts of Germany. This is completely new to me!





Tip at the restaurant is typically 1-5% of the bill, depending on the customer's satisfaction with the service. Not leaving any tip is considered rude if the service was satisfactory, but not uncommon if the service was bad (service is always included in the price of the meal). [...] True!





In the workplace, you are expected to bring cake or buy lunch for colleagues when it is your birthday, or when you are leaving the company. Your colleagues may collect money for a shared gift for you on your birthday/when you are leaving. "Expected" is way too strong, but it's considered a nice gesture.





Placing a phone call to somebody after 10 p.m. (22:00) should be avoided, unless by previous appointment or calling a friend. [...] Don't call people to discuss business in their spare time, except when it's important. Is there any country where people love to get phone calls at 3 in the morning?





Furthermore, between approximately 8 p.m. and 8.15 p.m (20:00 - 20:15) do not call anyone who you think might be interested in watching the news on television, as the prime time daily news are broadcast at that time. LOL, I guess this is a remnant of the 60s where we only had 1.5 TV channels and 1.5 news reports once a day. You can safely ignore this rule.





Unthoughtful driving on the Autobahn is regarded as rude. [...] True! But then again, everybody's rude on the Autobahn, you don't want to stick out, do you?





Public display of affection, such as holding hands or kissing in public places and public events, is commonly accepted and widely spread, but may be considered inappropriate in certain surroundings (workplace, church, high class restaurants, etc.) True to a degree, but come on, restaurants? Don't worry about that!





Especially in the north of Germany, using a candle to light a cigarette is said to kill a fisherman. The reason for this is that in former times fishermen earned their living during wintertime by producing matches. WTF? OK, now they're just making it up!





Opening an umbrella indoors or not closing your umbrella before stepping inside a building, even if there is more than enough room for it open, is considered to bring bad luck by some people. What's with all this bad luck nonsense? I never heard about that one, but on the other hand, I don't use umbrellas!





All in all you could say in Germany you can get away with anything that's considered OK in the States, UK and France. If you want to be liked, be what's internationally considered to be "nice" and try not to think about rules too much. Germany is not a very polite and observant country. We're rude, direct, and cold. Just like the local weather.